The Wrong Way to Network

Does it pay to network? Many people tell me that networking does not work for them. When I talk to some of them, I see why.

If networking does not work for you, see if you make any of the following mistakes.

1. You cannot help but to talk about yourself. Every conversation becomes about you.
2. You top every story with a better story.
3. You talk about your health ailments – a big turnoff.
4. You use negative words. (you whine)
5. Someone has done you wrong and you feel the need to share it.
6. You squash every suggestion they have to help you. You always have no time, no money, no energy, etc.

If you find yourself guilty of these traits – and we all do from time to time – then stop it!

Instead try the following.

Networking Tips

1. Ask questions. Ask others questions about how they did what they did. Get them to tell you their story. Keep the focus on them.  They will like you for it, and you might learn something.
2. Share the dream. When they ask you something, share your dreams and your thoughts but do not kill them with doubt. For example, the other day I was talking to this guy and I asked him what he wanted to do. He told me he wanted to do what I do, but then quickly followed with “…but I am too old to start now”. I have also heard I am too young, too rich, too poor, to overworked, too busy etc. In other words – excuses. Leave them at home .
3. Bite your tongue. If you find yourself about to say anything negative about someone or a company, bite your tongue until it hurts.

Overall, you want to leave everyone feeling as if talking to you benefited their day. The only way to do that is to share in their life and provide them encouragement and hope.